Top Ten Things to Do when you're bored at work

Everyone has downtime at work. I have a ton of it. That's how I can bless the world with this blog. Free time well spent.

My friend Caren hates how much free time she has. She complains that she's bored all the time. She trolls the internet looking for anything to do and asks me to help her get over her boredom.

To offer a solution, I have developed a list of things to do at work to entertain yourself. Please follow all of these rules or else!

1-Read this blog. Easy to do and super informative.

2-Superglue post its together. Enjoy the past time of watching your coworkers tear apart stickie after stickie when they try to get a new one. So much fun, really you should try it.

3-Manage your check book. I've done so much of this that I now have an advanced spreadsheet and auto pay on my accounts. Its like I get paid to manage my money!

4-Get into fantasy sports. Fantasy sports single handedly killed 450 million hours of work in the US last year. Now if we can just send fantasy sports to China, we might catch them again in the global economy. Burn....

5-Pack shrimp into your work mates' chairs. If you take the chair off of its stem, you can jam about 35 shrimp into it and then put it back together. They won't be able to figure out why their work area smells so bad. A couple weeks in, the office thinks that they have a B. O. problem. Instant entertainment!

6-Crank call other workers. Self explanatory really but so much fun. Place fake orders. Submit complaints. Pretend you are the boss of the company.

7-Design a super kick ass myspace page. Totally nerd out so when your ex girlfriend from high school looks you up, she'll know that you are the same nerd who loved the Ninja Turtles with your new Leonardo background. Cowabunga dude!

8-Start a comic strip. Everyday put together a really poorly drawn comic of the events of your office, copy it and distribute to the cool guys at work. If you catch Chris down the hall jerking off, let everyone know through your hilarious drawings.

Speaking of which...

9-Masterbate. Always fun right?

10-Seduce the old assistant down the hall. She's homely. She's hasn't had a date in years. Start by a little casual flirting. Extend to veiled sexual advances. Don't forget suggestive emails. Sit back and wait for the sexual harassment suit to come flying in. This worked for Isiah Thomas...

If you follow these 10 pieces of advice, you soon will be entertained until you get fired. Enjoy Caren!